Oh, hi

Do you know how with some friends you can go a few months without talking to them and then pick right up where you left off? I hope that's what we're like.

I had to put blogging on the back burner for a little bit while I got some schtuff figured out. I think I will probably update in detail on all the things. Until then here's the highlight reel.

Lola is nine months old. I am not sure when or how that happened. She has two teeth but is completely immobile. I thought there was an issue with her development. Turns out she's just really lazy. Good for her. Speaking of lazy. She has a lazy eye. We have to figure out what to do about that. There's an appointment coming up with a pediatric opthamologist. I was relieved to hear that they've done away with patches. Puff likes to talk like a pirate ("arghhhhh....") so I am sure the lack of a patch will be a disappointment to her.

Ryan has had several appointments all related to his speech. Through that process we have been told that he might be on the spectrum. They've thrown around PDD-NOS and verbal apraxia. Verbal apraxia was later ruled out. In the meantime, I made an appointment to see a developmental pediatrician and raised a stink to have a more thorough speech evaluation through our state-run early intervention program. That happened yesterday and I'm happy to say that my son failed every single category, qualifying him for EI. Starting in August he will be working with several new therapists. I have a team meeting at the end of July to put his development plan into action. This is the best news we've gotten in a long time. It's funny how your perspective on good news changes.

Joe and I have separated. This has probably been the hardest thing to put into words. I think if for no other reason than it lends to some sort of finality. We are seeing counselors separately and seeing a different counselor together. Right now I would say we are just holding the space. Which I guess is a nice way of saying that we live together and we are doing our best while we figure this all out. Our marriage, as it was, is over. Now the question is whether we can start a new marriage, a better marriage. Or not.

We hired an au pair who arrives with our family at the end of August. I have a lot I would like to share about her, but I want her permission before I do so. For now, suffice it to say that I am counting down the days until her arrival. I cannot wait. For so many reasons.

I started my own company. More to come on this at another time, but a hint is my blog redesign. I am in the process of building out my own website and shop, which is a tremendous undertaking. But it is also thrilling to be taking control of my life. The impetus to strike out on my own stemmed from the dissolution of my marriage and the potential for needing to both parent and support my children on my own. From this necessity, I have tapped into a strength and a part of myself I had forgotten existed. What's that saying? From the ashes a fire will rise...

So I hope my hiatus is over. I think I am ready to rejoin the land of the living. Or something like that.