Monday, November 9, 2009

Follicle Heaven

After a long and bumpy road (maritally, emotionally, physically) I am finally in follicle heaven. Joe's been really invested in this cycle and has gone with me to all of my clinic appointments. He's also dutifully given me all of my shots this month. He even canceled a dinner meeting with his area VP so that I wouldn't have to shoot myself up. I know that probably seems like small potatoes to some, but it meant the world to me (and it also means that he's changing) and I am eternally grateful.

By Saturday morning (CD7) I had 6 follicles that were growing wonderfully and more than a dozen that were waiting in the wings to grow. My lead follicle was already 18mm and they told me then we'd have to write him off for this cycle as he'd likely overdevelop.

Unfortunately my lining was only at a 4 and my e2 levels had started to climb too fast, I was heartbroken thinking they were going to cancel my cycle. Triggering me on Saturday was not an option as my 18mm follie was big, but not properly developed.

They scaled back my follistim by 25IU and added Estrace. The clinic nurse was terse at best and I left feeling really frightened.

I went back to clinic this morning and my lead follie is already at 28mm, so he's a goner. I have four more that are all ranging from 15-18, and a fifth that is 13.5. The Estrace was a godsend; my lining is up to 10 today.

I'm waiting to hear back from the clinic nurses with my lab results. If my e2 is still climbing they'll lower my follistim again tonight and bring me in tomorrow for a final scan before triggering tomorrow night. If my e2 is stable I'll stim for two more nights and trigger on Wednesday.

They talked to us about HOM today and I'm a little nervous. 4 mature follicles could mean 4 little bambinos. Or it could mean none.

Joe left clinic crying this morning, he's so excited, and I feel like I probably should have brought him with me sooner. Not seeing the follies and fully understanding the flood of emotions surrounding hormone levels and checks (even understanding the various hormones and what they mean in general) allowed him to be somewhat disconnected from this process.

As for how I'm feeling: queasy, hot, uncomfortable, like I have to pee but there's no pee in there, bloated and tired. Although most of the nausea and exhaustion comes at night about 90 minutes after my shot. The bloat and hot flashes are, unfortunately, daytime things.

So now we wait. And my little follies grow. And I am in heaven, even if it is a heaven for water retaining women who sweat profusely and have suitcases under their eyes.

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