a shift in thinking

Since my annual review last week I've had really negative feelings toward my job. It's hard not to feel like I do when you're told in one breath that you're doing an excellent job, you've accomplished so much, it's been a great year and in another breath your master's degree isn't the same as ours (being that mine is in Education and theirs are in Engineering) and that I'm not worth $5K more a year than I'm currently being paid.

I'm bitter, I won't lie. I watch my company spend over $2,000 a month on coffee, drop $30K for a PR agency that I recommend and pay our graphic designers $75 an hour to do exactly my job, but I'm not worth an extra $5,000 a year?

Of course, the first thing I did was look for another job. That's me in a nutshell - react and then overreact. But given the economy and the fact that we live in Albany, there just aren't that many opportunities right now. I'm still looking and thinking about what my next move will be. I'm considering the idea of going on to get my literacy certification and head back into education. But we'll see.

In the meantime, I cannot come here each day and be miserable. It's not good for my psyche. Ironically, transferring my posts from LJ to this blog helped me to see that. In doing so I stumbled across this post about my job here and how excited I was, how perfect it was, etc. It made me rethink things quite a bit and I've decided to stop focusing on all of the stuff that makes me so frustrated here and start focusing on the things that make this a decent gig. For example, I came in today at 7 a.m. and left at 8, drove the gym, signed up for spin and came back. I'm leaving in a half hour to take spin and then go home and shower and come back again around 11 to finish my day. How many jobs let you do that? I can take vacation whenever I want, and I come and go as I please.

Overall, I just need to shift my thinking. I think if I do I'll be much happier, and really if I'm happy then everybody's happy.